Friday 2 January 2015

The Prince Albert


I like visiting the Albert,
I like the way it commands a crossroads,

Welcoming all cardinal points of the compass,

Just like a traditional inn should.

I like visiting the Albert in springtime,
When vases of flowers greet you in the bar,

With vernal fragrance and equinoctial promise,

Stretching into blossoming infinity.

I like summer drinking in the Albert,
With a pint of Alton’s Pride,

It’s like an infusion of Thomas Hardy,

With every novel you’ve ever read

Returning like a Native.

I like autumn drinking in the Albert,

When mists and mellow fruitlessness

Entwine themselves around the eaves,

Just like a gothic Woman in White.

I like winter drinking in the Albert,

Sledging down the snow-scaped common,

Then in the bar for mulled ale and wine,

Just like we’re in A Christmas Carol.

I like chatting in the Albert,

With a catholic clientele of Prince, Pauper,

Snow White, Alice in Wonderland, many Musketeers,
And the occasional Sheriff of Nottingham.

I like walking around the Albert,

With a boulevard and a bowling green,

A welcome in the streets,
A chat on the allotments,

It’s like the Orwell pub of his dreams.

I don’t smoke, myself,
But I like the smokers at the Albert,

They congregate out the back,

Telling their varied stories,

Just like Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales.

I like sitting in the Albert,

With its sofas, armchairs, ornaments,

Wireless and pictures on the mantelpiece,
It’s like the day when war broke out.

So I only visit the Albert,

It’s the sans pareil of Stroud,

Once visited, then,

There is nowhere else to go,
Apart from the Crown and Sceptre,
Bisley House and Ale House –
But those are stories for another time.

2 comments:

  1. Don't forget The Lord John, Stuart, which despite being part of The Wetherspoons chain, and as such, is lacking the character of many smaller boozers, but nevertheless stays open later than most of the others, it also offers a fine selection of booze, including usually at least one localish ale, for which it is not usually necessary to take out a mortgage, (unlike many of the smaller establishments), and if one can learn to ignore the large screen television sets and excuse the smells of frying flesh, can at times be a reasonable alternative to anyone on a budget wishing to enjoy a decent pint.... or even a cheap but filling plate of grub... I too prefer independent public houses, generally speaking, but have always found the staff to be pleasant enough, the toilets clean enough, and the ale of consistent quality, and reasonably priced enough ....Admittedly, I've never drank there of a weekend, but for coming back on the last train from Gloucester at least once a week, it isn't a bad establishment in my opinion...

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  2. Good point and a good pint made, Matt. I'll have a dekko before long.

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